More then sum total…

ipodRemember when Apple came out with iPods? I wanted one too. My boyfriend at the time heard me talk about it and decided to by me a refurbished one and give it to me as a Valentine’s Day gift. He managed to wrap it nicely and I remember he even put a little chocolate on top of the box. I was really touched. I normally didn’t allow people to buy me expensive or near to expensive gifts. I hooked up my almost new iPod to a computer to put my music on it and no matter what I did, how many times I reset it, tried over, it just wouldn’t work. It turned out to be defective and I had to take it to an Apple store to have it replaced. I was talking to one of my spiritual fellow seekers a few days later, telling him about what had happened. He listened very attentively and then asked me: “So do you always feel not good enough? It’s quite obvious, if you ask me. Not only did you manifest a deficient iPod, but you didn’t even feel good enough for a new one!” He was right. What an eye opener! It took me a while to answer. I shouldn’t say answer; I actually started crying. All I could mutter was: “I guess so!” I mistakenly thought that what I do, how I do it and why, is me and that my life experiences constituted who I was and my worth. I should have know better I agree. The Course in Miracles says it best: “My worth is established by God.” Why oh why, do I let myself forget?

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